Rape is a horrible thing to experience. Once it happens to you, you don’t want to tell anyone, because you are afraid. Or you think people will think less of you after you tell them. While these attacks are not the fault of the victim, you can take some precautionary measures to keep yourself safe.
Trust your instincts. Don’t underestimate your own judgment. If you feel uncomfortable in someone’s company, avoid being secluded with them and be firm if coercion is attempted. Attackers will more often prey on people who look vulnerable and seem easily manipulated.
Bring a friend if you are going to a party or other event in a strange place. If you can’t bring someone you know, give a friend your phone number and expected time you’ll be home, and tell him or her that you’ll check in.
Keep an eye on your drink. Date rapists can lace drinks with flavorless chemicals. Don’t go back to a drink if you’ve left it unattended, and don’t accept an open drink from a stranger (unless you saw it made at the bar or similar).
Walk with a friend if possible, especially if you’re walking at night or in a remote location. If you’re going on a jog, bring a companion.
Stay alert by avoiding headphones (which impair your ability to hear ambient sounds), or hats that block your peripheral vision. Be aware of people in the area, ahead and behind you.
Stick to populated, well-lit areas if you need to walk alone. Avoid poorly lit areas, or areas with minimal escape routes.
Carry pepper spray or a similar item for emergency self-defense.
Learn basic self-defense moves. Preparing yourself for a potential attack allows you to react better when faced with the fear and stress of the situation.
Move with confidence. Someone who looks purposeful and physically capable is a less appealing target.
Confront a pursuer. If you know that someone is following you, turn and ask them the time. Get a good look at their face and overall appearance. Attackers prefer to target victims who haven’t seen their face.
Struggle and yell if attacked.
Understand that rape isn’t just committed by strangers, but by friends, relatives, and even colleagues, as well. Often victims will know and possibly trust their rapist prior to the offense.
We often feel sadness over occurrences in our lives that we have no control over. Perhaps a best friend moves away, or maybe we experience the loss of a family member. Not all of us know how to express our feelings. Some cannot talk it over with parents, and some just think that hurting themselves is the only way to express their inner feelings.
First of all, know that crying is not a sign of weakness. Let out your tears! Bottled up emotions lead to more emotional breakdowns in the future. Crying not only cleanses the eyes, but washes the pain away. (Note: This is a metaphor. Crying does not literally wash away pain.)
Keep a diary. Each time you’re feeling down in the dumps, write a journal entry about it. When you’re feeling better you can look back at the entry and think, “How did this pain make me stronger?”.
Find someone to talk to. Find someone you trust. If you feel comfortable talking to them and if they can listen to you, understand your pain, then they are the right person for you to turn to.
Try to get to the source of the sadness. Is it due to a person in particular? If so, avoid that person. If one person is the source for your depression, then it’s not worth talking to him or her.
Work through the reasons that provoke your crying. If you are jealous of someone, try to figure out if this reaction is really worth feeling sad about.
Allow time to grieve. If sadness is due to the death of someone close to you, then it may take a bit longer for the sadness to pass. It is healthy to feel sad at the loss of a loved one so understand this and take one day at a time. Crying is perfectly normal at a time like this. Talking about it and expressing your feelings will also help.
Use art to free some of your pain. It can be a poem, a song, short story, or a painting that describes what you’re feeling and going through.
Muster the courage to feel what actually exists inside you; the courage of an open heart.
If your sadness is related to a family member passing away, do not forget them, but keep memories of them [pictures, home videos, favorite songs, etc.].
Is it because of love? Somebody you feel is attractive but you don’t have enough courage to tell them that? Write Letters, e-mails, Texts and save them in drafts and read them every day.